I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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