Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
