that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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