He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
How's work?
Spinning.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
