Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize