..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
