This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
