the new term for farting is butt boxing.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Randomize
