i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Randomize
