She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
40s are totally the cure
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Randomize
