Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Randomize