Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize