SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
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