I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Randomize
