I only kidnapped one of them. chill
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
We are two peas in an std pod
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
