some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
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