then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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