You really coming over, don't trick.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
