ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
please come you make the beer taste better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
they're like a gay fantastic four
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize