you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Randomize
