She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
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