there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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