eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
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