What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Even the bartender felt bad for me
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
