Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
She tied me up with her honor cords...
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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