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We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
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