i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Randomize
