so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize