Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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