I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
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