Is it normal to miss your booty call?
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
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