what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
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