are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
