you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Randomize
