the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
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