i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
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