For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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