ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
