so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
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I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
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If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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