Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
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I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
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