Dual....:-)
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize