if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
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