Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
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