How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
Dude, I was completely sober last night, didn't puke on my shoes, went home with an incredibly beautiful girl, wore a condom, and didn't wake up in a puddle of urine this morning.
hah, sarcasm, classic
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize