Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
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