Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Randomize