last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Randomize
