I'm drive I can fine osifer
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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