we have pet lesbian snakes
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.