If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
