Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
