he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Randomize
